I have mentioned before that I am amazingly lucky to have a really understanding partner, who has had her own struggles with depression too so she knows where I am coming from a lot of the time. She is, among other things one of my main muses, especially for my more positive writing. This year I wrote a short piece to put in her Valentine’s card, and I though I would share it.
You are the very paragon of light,
when all I want is darkness in my eyes.
You are the shining light of honest truth,
when all I want is bare-faced stinking lies.
You are the blinding power of the sun,
when I have lost myself in darkest night.
You are the life that nestles in the air,
when I deny the breath that is my right.
I do not always know what’s best for me,
even when I think I know it all.
You must feel that I’m a lock without a key,
and still you keep on coming back for more.
Your heart beats always strong with love and care
Your soul will stand the trying tests of time
I love you almost more than I can bear
And can’t believe my fortune; you are mine.
Since I decided that I was going to write more often, be that in the blog, or poetry, or a handwritten journal, I have been somewhat amazed at how it has helped. I have written almost every day. I have written more poems in the last two weeks than in the last two years!
A big part of the impetus to keep me going in the last few days has come from a post that Kristen Lamb put on her blog following NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month for those that don’t follow it, the idea is to write a 50,000 word novel entirely in the month of November ), you can read the post here, it’s a great read and I got a lot from it. The basic concept is one that anyone seeking self improvement, self help, external help or any sort of change should at least think about; every journey starts with one step. My journey towards living a more positive life started with the simple action of agreeing with someone. I agreed with my mum that I needed to go to the Doctor and tell him how/what I was feeling. That one thing started me down the wobbly road with may pitfalls, cliffs, alligators, T Rexes and swamps that lead to where I am today, teetering along the narrow path of a positive life. That was almost 20 years ago now, but I can still feel the echoes and ripples of that moment.
Whatever the endeavour, a single step is always the best way to start. Want to be a writer? Write something, anything! Want to be a painter? Buy some cheap paints, some paper, and let yourself go on the page. Want to be able to run a marathon? Go for a walk first. Want to blog every single day about something people want to read about? I am still working on that one, but I am finding that just commiting to writing a few times a week is a good first step, I have usually written more without even trying really.
Does that make sense? Have you started any journeys recently? Are you well down a path that started with a small moment?
PS as I wrote the title I was reminded of a quote from my favourite series of fantasy novels “New roads demand a Hoopak”. 10 points for identifying the novels and 25 points for the character 🙂
Today this blog passed it’s 400th view. Thank you to everyone that’s reading and coming along on this journey with me. There is lots more to come, and hopefully another proper post later today.
A few days ago prego and the loon nominated me for the very inspiring blogger award for which I am really grateful and touched. At the time I said I was going to put my 7 things about myself in a new post, along with my nominations.
I spent some time thinking about the sort of thing I should put on here, but in the end I just decided on some really random stuff rather then overthinking it!
1. I love haggis
2. I am a step-father to a wonderful 5 year old
3. I will be 39 when I get my first tattoo next year
4. I am afraid (very!!! Phobic in fact) of Crane Flies
5. I think that Rottweilers are beautiful, noble dogs but they have to be raised right
6. Writing scares me, but liberates me too
7. When I was a kid I used to race Toppers (Single person racing yachts) on the Dummersee in Germany
So now I need to nominate a few blogs that I find inspirational. I am new to this blogging lark, despite a few false starts over the last few years, so I don’t really have many to choose from, but some that I have very much enjoyed and have taken some inspiration from are, in no particular order :
1. The Simple Dollar
2. Walking No Line
3. Christian Mihai
4. Rose Chimera
From somewhere to me
a spark descends; insinuates
A fragment of spirit
(whatever that means)
A happy invasion;
it triggers more sparks inside.
Neurons fire and the cannonade
Battle is joined in the depths.
Explosions light up the gloom.
Fireworks punctuate the night.
the sparks coalesce.
Each becomming less itself
and more part of a whole.
The new gestalt throbs for a while,
then throws out tentacles of jagged purpose;
lightning flashes with direction.
My hand moves the pen.
Any and all comments welcome and encouraged.